Appendix B. "Watch That Hubris!"

When I'd dodged real work (so I could spend more time cycling, actually!) for as long as I could muster, and finished my Ph.D., I went to work in "the real world." At the time, I can remember being confounded by potential employers who were neither particularly impressed with my list of qualifications, nor noticeably keen to offer the levels of remuneration—that's "compensation" to my friends in the United States—that my ego had in mind.^[1] The problem seemed to be a lack of what they called "experience." I was dumbfounded at the shortsightedness, and railed against all the injustices for several weeks of job hunting. Why can't they just see I'm so damn clever, and give me lots of money?

^[1] I learned a hard lesson in negotiation when accepting the job I chose. The manager said, "How much are you looking for?" I summoned my most devious cunning and countered with "somewhere between £20,000 and £25,000," and before my heart had pulsed another beat he'd replied with a final "We'd like to offer you the job for £20,000." I've never done that again.

Of course, these years of hard-won experience later, I absolutely appreciate the importance of experience. I've worked with highly qualified people who had nary a practical bone in their body, and with people with few or no qualifications who were brilliant engineers. I am forced to work on occasion with people who don't care about doing a quality job, and aren't in the slightest bit interested in learning anything new or better. These folks are a blot on our profession. The shabby nature of the software development industry cannot be entirely laid at the door of ignorant managers, tricky marketers, and impatient users. A lot of it is people who would be better off counting paper clips and looking out the window in an industry where their malpractice would do less harm—not in the building of the most complex creations of human imagination.

Ho hum. As my mum has been wont to say far too many times to me over the years: "Watch that hubris!" So here we go. In the spirit of humility, and just to plain amuse you, I'm going to detail some of the more pitiful casualties of my progression from hapless neophyte to someone that knows a little bit about a couple of things. If you recognize any of your own crimes in my experiences, shush! Just keep quiet, and let me take the heat.